Monday, April 11, 2011


It's amazing to me how much fear can rule ones life. The fear of not beign able to provide for your family. Fear for your health. The fear of maybe losing a job. The fear of losing someone you love The fear of losing a child. The fear of what will come. There's soooo many fears one can have. It's impossible to list them all.

Each different and involving different emotions. Sometimes emotions you can't even explain or put into any sorts of words. I'm pretty good with words but here lately I've some to the conclusion that words no longer make a difference.

How do you handle your fear? Do you put it in God's hands, do you eat it, so you exercise it off, take it out on others, bottle it up? What works for you.

I haven't been doing to well with my fears and concerns. Mainly I say I talk to others about them but it doesn't make me feel any better. For that matter neither does blogging about it. I have some fears.. such as the dark, that scares me alot! But other fears such as my health and situation in life. The things I have no real control over. I know have no control over any of it. Yet all of the possible outcomes of a few thigns have been running through my head. Causes me not to sleep thinking.... endless thinking. Literally, I don't sleep. I am not sure how to fix this. It's annoying and I know its just because this period of my life is a struggle in making decisions. There's soo many decisions to make, never knowing which ones lead to the path I want or should take.

I hate disappointing others more than anything but am coming to a point and time in my life where I'm understanding I have to at certian points. Which just blows!

Choas for sure

I find that I have not written for some time about anything with meaning as well life has been throwing me curve ball after curve ball. Pretty sure its nearly to the point of breakign my back trying to hit the damn things.

I hate whinning so rather than writing I've found myself keeping the thoughts to myself and those who are closest to me.

It's been overwhelming enough right now in life to deal with it all much less to write it all down and look over what i have written. i find that rather than beign healing it would be more so depressing.

So, on another note of a re-cap I have created a new blog for all crafting. Seems to make more sense to use this as a personal blog and keep my crafts and creations on the other blog.

I'm going to try more to write about somethings. I have to admit I do miss it alot.